It's not the heat, it's the stupidity

There is no rational explanation for RAGBRAI. 500 miles on a bike across Iowa in the July heat on crowded roads with temps in the 100’s. The heat index hit 110. Sweating like a pig. 20,000 estimated riders, long lines for everything, no healthy food in sight. Snarky headwinds on several days. Camping on the side of the road, showering with a hose. It is the stupidity.

I’ve been asked why do they do it in July? I think it is to keep the numbers down…if it was in a cooler month, 100,000 people would show up. It is that much fun. Really. Rolling hills, nice folks, rich farm lands, scenic Iowa (that is not an oxymoron), great food (fried, smoked, grilled and on a stick), comradery with other riders doing the same stupid thing you are, beer (and more beer), parties, burning 25,000 calories, pork chops, corn on the cob, pie, homemade ice cream, people truly happy to see you come into their small town (and happy to see you go!) and participating in a 40 year old biking tradition that may be as well known as the Tour de France (well at least in Iowa).

I had planned on blogging every day, but had technical issues. No connection to the internet most days, and when I could connect, the link was glacially slow. I’ll recap the trip in one long and rambling post.

Day 1

We started in Sioux Center. The post for that day went out, see below. I ran with my team: LiveRstrong. We set off at 8:30, which was later than I did last year, but it was a short day only 55 miles. Riding with the team was different. Our fearless leader towed a 100 pound boom box/beer cooler. A good thing for me, I could keep up. We stopped in Orange City, settled by the Dutch for breakfast, but the town had no pub or beer garden so we went another 5 miles to the next town that did have a pub on the left. We met up with other like minded teams and I saw a bunch of folks I had met in Sioux Center. Repeat for the next two towns. Team BrewHaHa published a guide to bars along the route with a few off route bars. We detoured a couple of miles to Germantown, which had a fun road house. We were hot coming in, and the guy unloading the beer truck let us cool off in the trailer. Next stop was Marcus. My team went screaming off…fearless leader still towing boom box/cooler. He was doing 25 mph. I was barely able to keep up and was pooped when we hit Marcus. Now Marcus was the last town before we hit Cherokee which was the overnight town. The last town on the road is the traditional party town before you head into the overnight town. It was going to be a long stop. Discretion being the better part of valor, I opted for some shade, several bottles of cold water and a solo run into Cherokee. Stopped at Beekman’s for my first root beer float of the trip with homemade ice cream, it is a miracle potion that will restore you enough to make it to the end town! Our bus driver found a nice place to camp near the Aquatic Center in Cherokee. I set up my tent and headed for the pool. More team members met up with us in Cherokee, a half pound fried pork cutlet for dinner and some beer at camp finished the day for me.

Day 2

It was another hot, hot day. Most of the team partied hard, and was planning a later start, I snuck out earlier to avoid heat and crowds. I avoided neither. Road was jammed with everyone else who had the same plan. People typically stop at the first town for breakfast. Picture 5,000 hungry, hot people on bikes hitting a small town of 1,000 people all at once. The other 5,000+ keeping coming for another hour or two. I often stop to drink two bottles of water and refill at the water station and then go on to the second town for food which is less jammed (although others use this same strategy, so town number 2 can be busy). Fortunately our team has Cheerios, milk and OJ so I’m not starving. Actually found a nice local coffee shop in the first town with no line; good coffee and a wedge of something with egg and ham in it. I like to find the local places. Every town has street fair type of vendors lining the streets, the food is usually OK there, but it is the same over and over. I ran into a few team members during the day and other folks I met earlier, but mostly ran on my own. Ate at Mr. Pork Chop. We got free popcorn in Schaller, the Popcorn Capital of the World. I stopped in Nemaha for a beer at the beer garden, and spent some time in Sac City. Nemaha had the best shirts. The front and back are shown below. I had a college roommate from Sac City and I asked about him. The docent at the museum that holds the world’s largest popcorn ball (really) told me my roommate had passed away. But the popcorn ball was still cool. The ride was only 62 miles, but when I got into Lake View, the overnight town, I found our camp site was another 8-9 miles. Lake View has the southernmost glacial lake in Iowa and it is big, so I had to bike all the way around, but we had a great camp site with a view of the entertainment venue across the lake. I found a shower and a short cut into town. Later several of the team went to a church for a pasta dinner. We could hear the music across the lake, so a lot of us stayed in camp listened to music and drank beer.

A view of Lake View!

Day 3

Hottest day of the trip. 82 miles. Hot south head winds. I left early again on my own to avoid heat…didn’t work. Hot, hot, hot. Lots of water. Made it to Lohrville about 30 miles down the road, official population 368 and I think all of the locals showed up to set out a nice place to stop. Mostly shady, local food booths. I had two ears of bacon wrapped sweet corn dipped in butter. This could be the state food of Iowa! They set up a nice petting zoo. Two Chihuahuas, a rabbit, a baby pig and a few turkens. A turken is a cross between a chicken and a turkey. I thought they were baby buzzards. I talked to the owner of the turkens, who said they got them for fun. Hadn’t eaten one yet. I told him if they could cross one with a duck they could sell them in Louisiana as turduckens. Mr. Pork Chop was set up in Lohrville. Now Mr. Pork Chop is a RAGBRAI legend. All they sell are pork chops, an inch thick and smoked over corn cobs. The original Mr. Pork Chop started the business 35 years ago and would yell Pooooork Choooooop as riders rode past. He is retired, but he was sitting in a recliner by the bus. I stopped to visit, and we chatted for about 15 minutes. He did a Pooooork Choooooop for me, not the volume of the old days, but the gravelly delivery I expected. I felt honored. I met up with a couple on my team from Omaha, yep, Huskers. But just as nice as you can imagine. We talked about meeting the team bus in Farnhamville, another 10 miles down the road. Everyday there is a designated meeting town. All of the support vehicles take a route that avoids the bicycles to the next town, but it is designed so there is one town where vehicles and bikes cross paths. You can meet up with your team, get water or beer. The ride from Lohrville to Farnhamville was hard; persistent hot head winds and the route would continue into the wind for another 20 miles. One option was to continue on, the other was to hit the beer garden for a couple of hours and grab a ride on the team bus for more beer and a ride into town. Yep, I along with about six others took plan B. We had lunch, or maybe a second lunch? Meals are hard to distinguish. Ice cream makes a good breakfast. I met a guy on a unicycle rolling into Farnhamville. The crazy dude did 30 miles into the wind on a fat tired unicycle. No coasting downhill, no bending over to avoid headwind. Crazy, crazy dude. But he was smart enough to bum a ride on our bus to the end town. He didn’t want a beer, so I bought him cold smoothie, you want to be nice to crazy people. Actually he was a great guy and helped us unload the bus when we got to Webster City. He just did crazy things. We stayed in a family’s yard in Webster City, they let us use the bathroom and shower. I had dinner at St. Thomas Aquinas, it was sponsored by the KofC. Veggie lasagna and beef and noodles. Good eats. I met up with a bunch of the team and we wandered around town, more beer and more food. I found a local Mexican convenience store with a kitchen in the back; authentic homemade steak tacos, two for $3. Best deal on RAGBRAI. We popped into the Three Dog Night concert, I had to explain to the younger members of the team (heck, they were all younger than me) who Three Dog Night was. I had seen them in concert at Red Rocks in 1970. They have not aged well. Stayed for 2 songs, said we did it and went back to camp.

Turkens

The only pig I saw in Iowa (me on the right)

The real Mr. Pork Chop

Day 4

Another long day. 77 miles. Still hot, still head winds. Wondering if I can meet up with bus at meeting town again (I like this option). Fortunately the route is not into the wind all day long. Channel 13 out of Des Moines films riders leaving Webster City…the top story is the heat on RAGBRAI. Temp hits 105 and heat index hits 110 this day. My bike thermometer reads 106. Fought some early head winds, meeting town is sounding like a good pace to meet bus. Great breakfast at a local café called Katy’s. Kind of a homemade open face burrito thing. I meet up with a couple on the team who ride on a tandem. We talk about wind and they say our route will have cross wind most of the way into Marshalltown. I pass on team bus and head on. I met up with a team member from St. Louis; we really get along I’m only 9 years older than him, and  he is a strong rider. He wants to ride together for a while; fortunately we get cross winds and the ride is good. We kept a good pace and my buddy is willing to go at my speed for a bunch of miles. It was nice keeping pace with him. Hit a little head wind and slow down, but the ride is OK, drinking lots of water and finding shade, and root beer floats. Did not stop into many places just working to get to Marshalltown. This was a lot like the hottest day last year where there were so many heat exhaustion cases. Passing through one town I was looking for the water station to refill water bottles and the town had not set one up. I’ve just asked folks if I can fill at an outside spigot at a house, no big deal. But in this town I had two locals blow me off…first unfriendly folks I’d met. Oh well, the park had a water tap. We stayed at a family’s house again, and I had to get directions…it was on the south end of town 3-4 miles outside of the central area. Our hosts were super. They had a beautiful house and big yard, plenty of places to put tents. Had a giant cooler of ice cold beer and water for us. A great outdoor area in the back with a TV set. We watched the news on RAGBRAI and people pointed and yelled “It’s Bob!” I was on TV…channel 13 caught me leaving Webster City…my 2.3 seconds of fame! My buddy from St. Louis and I rode out to a local Italian restaurant. My buddy was hoping for real Italian food. We got Iowa Italian food instead. Filling and good, but not the same as “The Hill” in St. Louis. We hustled back to camp because we saw dark clouds on the horizon. Clouds turned into a whopper of a storm. 65 mph winds, heavy rain; blew down tents and our host’s tent canopy. Short term forecast was for more and worse weather. Our host had gone into town to hear the Little River Band and raced back to make sure we were safe, got everyone inside out of the weather. Some of the team was out and had to work their way into camp around the storm. Most everyone camped out in the house overnight. My tent was fine and I slept outside, the weather broke and it was cooler.

Channel 13 News

Breakfast

Day 5

Great biking day for me. After the change in weather, wind was from north and west. I got in almost 100 miles. Rode strong with mostly cross winds. Bike thermometer read “only” 96. Rolling hills, very scenic Iowa. Felt like a leisurely day. Stopped here and there. The first town was too crowded for breakfast. Went on to the next town a total of 35 miles. Saw signs for sausage gravy and homemade biscuits at the firehouse. Good encouragement to keep running. In addition to sausage gravy, I had a kolaches…Czech dough with filling. I also had a jaternice sandwich. I asked what jaternice was…it is assorted pig parts, mostly from the head that is made into a squishy sausage that is grilled and served on rye bread. Kind of like scrapple without the corn mush. I asked if they were selling many of the jaternice sandwiches…he said once they heard what it was made of most folks declined. I thought it was good. I stopped in Shellsburg and talked to a couple of locals…this is the home of Tiny But Mighty popcorn. They had a stand and I met the farmer who discovered a variety of popcorn that has 3’ ears with small kernels…boy is it good popcorn. I ate two bags and will order some for the house. The ride ended at Cedar Rapids…the biggest town we hit on the ride. I liked the town, but folks told me it has not fully recovered from the flood in 2008. We camped near Veteran’s Memorial Park, this was the tightest place we camped and it was on the side of a road, but it worked out. We met a nice local cop who helped us fit into the “camp site”. I met a bunch of nice locals in the area. On the way in I was offered a shower, a place to camp and several free beers. Sat and chatted and drank free beer with locals who were happy to have a reason to party. Popped into a local pub, that was hoping to see more riders. My St. Louis buddy and I grabbed a shuttle into town. I had the address for a good Irish pub…my buddy had brought a case of Guinness for the trip, so we were both happy to find it on tap. Crowded pub, 1 hour wait for food, but we just sipped Guinness and talked. The fish and chips was great…best fried fish I’ve had in a long time…worth the wait. We stopped into the concert venue where Counting Crows was gonna play. Way crowded, I headed back to camp. Most of LiverStrong went to the concert and had a great time, kinda wished I’d stayed, but I needed the sleep.

Tiny but Mighty Corn

Friendly cop who was tagged by the team

Day 6

Short, short day. Only 40 miles. The ride was over before it started! But it was fun. Way crowded out of Cedar Rapids. They routed us through the Czech Village/New Bohemia District. Narrow street and bridge…kinda crawled through the area. Looked like a nice place to hang out, if I get back to Cedar Rapids I’ll come back. It was wear your school colors day. I got a “Villanova Cycling” shirt from the VU cycling team and wore it…my buddy from Omaha wore his Nebraska shirt. The route out of Cedar Rapids was hillier than I expected…they were fun hills. Our first stop was Mount Vernon, a really cute college town, home of Cornell College, I got my picture taken with the school mascot, the Ram. Had a BLT wrap for breakfast…really good. I stopped for a pizza cooked in a firetruck. They put an Italian wood fired oven in the truck and made a good pizza. No other real stops along the way on the short trip into Anamosa. Anamosa has a prison, the town’s theme is “ride it like you stole it!” We camped in a field next to a fancy charter group that had matching tents…this charter sets up and takes down your tent for you each night, pretty posh. We looked pretty rag tag next to them, but we had more fun. I found the pool and after cleaning up, a group of us went into town for dinner. We found a church that had a baked potato bar…you could get chili, beef stroganoff, ham and cheese. I had it all. We hit a few bars and the beer garden.

Pizza Truck!

Day 7

The last day. I did see some pretty wildflowers along the road. Several of the team had a lot of fun in Anamosa and decided to take the bus. I headed off looking for breakfast on the road. The last day is a bit different, many of the vendors have packed up and there are less options. The first two towns were jammed. One town had a nice spread, but the line was a mile long. I grabbed some fruit and headed to the third town about 35 miles from the start. I found a smoothie/burrito stand with a short line…good breakfast, but I was running out of gas.  This was the meeting town and the bus was heading in, so I met up with those on the bus. We found a local pub and Bloody Marys looked good. I decided to ride the bus to the end. When we hit Clinton, we looked for a place to meet up with the rest of the team, and discovered we were out of beer…a quick stop and we reloaded for those riding in (have to have beer for the end of the road). Our deadline was 3:00 to meet up, and the last rider came in at 2:59…so we were on the road back to Sioux Center on time…but it was a loooong slow drive. The bus gets about 4 miles per gallon and has a smallish gas tank, a lot of stops for gas. After dropping some off along the way, eating and unloading we hit the hotel at 2:00 am. RAGBRAI XL over. I was up at 6:00 to head back to Colorado…tired but happy.

Iowa Wildflowers

Packing the bus to go home